I felt like talking about something a tad more positve again today as all of my last posts were kinda sad. I’m sorry for that by the way, but sometimes it just helps me survive to write all the pain inside myself down and share it with ye.
Anyways, I wanted to tell you about my dreadsperience today – great pun, right ? 😀
I was wearing synthetic dreadlocks for about a month, they were made by “Dreads by Aja”. I can only recommend her. I got my order very fast and they were in a great condition, and oh – they looked amazing.
Other than the dreads I got rubber bands to install them with, which I cannot really recommend, they snapped a lot and I had to renew at least one or two of them every day.
At first, we had to install the dreadsies, of course. We did that by combing my hair, sectioning it, and then braiding the synthetic dreads in. We did half of it in the evening and the other half in the afternoon, cause my mum’s – who mainly did the installing work- finger hurt too much. All in all it took us 6 hours to install 35 DoubleEnded Dreads.
After we installed them, we went to the festival I told you about before. (If you’d like to read about that, here you go!) It was amazing to be inbetween all those people with natural dreads, i only met one person that knew about synthetics. A lot of people complimented me on them, which was a great feeling, cause although i loved them from the beginning, I wasn’t too sure, if other people would do that too. (I live in a small town, people can be quite conservative at times.)
I spent 3 nights up there, and it was great. I got to touch real dreads for my first time ! Compared to my synthetics they were really stiff and hard. In the beginning it was fairly hard to sleep with them in, cause I wasn’t used to that much bulk of hair, and they weren’t exactly cosy, but I got used to it pretty fast.
The other thing that took getting used to was the weight. For the first couple of days, my neck was actually killing me! But once I got used to it, I was perfectly fine. – Actually, when I took them out, it felt like having no hair at all and the missing weight really confused me.
I got a lot of compliments for them and I really loved them, but on the other hand, there were a lot of ugly confrontations I had aswell.
The looks people give you. I’m used to getting weird looks for the way I dress, but hell, people looked at me in a way I had never seen before. It was actually painful. When I walk through my hometown (remember small town!) I usually greet people, I still did, but suddenly they stopped to greet back. I found that quite offensive to be honest.
Things people say to you. Well there were really 2 types of mean talk I got, lice or weed. People often talked about both, but I usually managed to joke a little about it, and they understood that I don’t have lice or smoke weed. I thought it was amazing how many people believed that I did both just because my hair changed. Other than that I got a few of complains about the hair. The first one was on an encounter with a classmate, who -while i was standing in front of him- turned to his friend, and just said “Oh god, she looks like shit with them in!”. I didn’t really know what to say to this, but it actually hurt me a lot. Especially cause it was coming from a person I see nearly every day. Other than that there were a few people that said stuff like that, but eventually you just start to try and not listen to it and remember the compliments others gave you. “Do you really think that this is beautiful?” was my favorite comment of all. I was just so confused that anyone would ask that, – obviously I wear them cause I think they’re beautiful.
People grabbing your hair. Oh my – The amount of people – preferably drunk – that just grabbed into my hair. Sir, this is not a petting zoo, don’t you dare to touch my hair without asking first. In the beginning it was fine, but it’s actually quite scary when people grab your hair suddenly, and you just don’t know what’s happening. Esp. if they’re drunk, and dont stand as stable anymore and pull you down.
But I do have to rant a little about how rude some people reacted. I don’t mind people expressing their opinions, even if i feel that having an opinion about my looks is a bit superfluous. Anyways, if I went up to a person with “normal hair” and talked to them, the way they talked to me, – oh, Lord save me – I’d be in hell. And i don’t get how anyone can feel like it’s acceptable to talk to someone in an unacceptabel manner just because they look different. When I was a young child, I was told to follow my dreams and BE MYSELF.
And you grow older, and everyone tells you that you should give up on your dreams, cause you won’t reach them anyways, and you can be yourself, as long as you’re like anyone else. But don’t you dare, to be different, – oh no. For real? I spent so much time in my life struggling with myself, because other people told me I can’t be who I am. And i hated myself, for being who I am. I’m still learning to love myself, but I know for sure, if you are yourself, you will feel a lot more free and probably also a lot happier.
Actually the least judging people were children – that were usually dragged away by their parents (urgh…). I loved the way they look at you with big eyes, and ask you wether they can touch your hair. And while they do, their eyes just grow even bigger and they glow, and you smile, bent down, cause they can’t reach it otherwise. They not only make you feel accepted, they make you feel special. I’m so happy for all of those loving encounters I had.
And please don’t get me wrong, there were so many other great people, that made me feel a lot more confident about my hair. A lot more confident about myself.
After a month of time, I braided them out again. I had to comb my roots out for 6 hours. It was so painfull. The mistake I made was using dry shampoo. NEVER EVER DO THAT WHEN YOU HAVE DREADS IN!
I found out that you aren’t supposed to do that, just a few days after I had gone through all the pain of combing them out.
In the beginning it was fairly weird to be without my dreadsies. I missed them and it felt like a part of myself was missing. It actually took some getting used to to combing my hair again and having to style it before I can go out.
All in all, I would say it was an experience worth making. I actually loved wearing them and we went through our ups and downs, but although I talked about the downs a bit more, to me it feels like the ups were a lot stronger. (Like feeling a bit more positive about myself again!)
I still miss wearing them and I can’t wait to either get a new set or an accent kit, and install a whole head again, or just a few. No matter which way, just install them back in again.
(And yes, thats myself and my beautiful dreads on the picture!)